There is joy in efficient resource usage, like how I tie together this monstrously long essay with the thinnest of critical through-lines.

There’s more to it than Eyes Wide Shut. Let’s tell ourselves that.

Every three years a white male director aged 45-55 walks into a movie producer’s office and says “I want to re-make 2001: A Space Odyssey, but you know what? It’s a love story.”

There goes Mando, leaving his ship parked in the middle of nowhere with nobody guarding it. I wonder if there is any plot or thematic significance to this.

Unlike Slate.com, I don’t play games with you. This post is exactly what the title says it is.

Monsters, Inc. might be a good movie, but it is definitely a poorly run company.

How can one hope to be a legend when there’s 8,000 people on the internet demonstrating how much one sucks?

Music school wasn’t about how to make music good. That part was, perhaps wrongly, assumed. No, music school is where you figure out whether music should be good. And that’s where it starts to get bad.

White men, take heed: home-made charcuterie is ok, statutory rape is not. Pretty simple.

After he sold Street Sharks, but before he appeared in a poster on my bathroom wall, Vin Diesel made a biopic about a hero mobster who rejects free legal advice from Peter Dinklage.